30 Minutes or Less

by brian

Aziz Ansari and Jesse Eisenberg team up for a stoner/buddy/action/caper movie which promises to be a laugh a minute.  Ansari has been poised for years to make a break out.  He spent two seasons on MTV’s “Human Giant”, has had bit parts in Funny People, Get Him to the Greek, and I Love You Man.  Ansari has been on the rise lately having hosted the MTV Movie Awards, a standup special and, of course, his wimpy Tom Haverford on NBC’s “Parks and Recreation”.  He will help Eisenberg get past his subdued and seemingly Asperger’s afflicted acting style.  Once he was considered the poor man’s Michael Cera, Eisenberg has a chance to stretch his comedy legs.

30 Minutes or Less rounds out its cast with the always funny Danny McBride and Nick Swardson.  They are the ridiculous catalysts.  The writers of the movie are unknown in terms of actual work, but seem to be competent to bring a comedy such as this to the big screen.

Now the bad part.  This movie would be hilarious if it weren’t for the fact that the unbelievable premise actually happened and ended fatally.  In 2003, Pennsylvania pizza delivery man, Brian Wells, walked into a bank and demanded $250,000 or the timebomb strapped around his neck would go off.  Once police arrived, they arrested him and left, what they believed to be a tremendous bluffer, handcuffed on the sidewalk.  As television cameras rolled and the images were broadcast live, the bomb timed out and blew a fist-sized hole in Wells’ chest.

If folks see this movie without knowing the grusome inspiration, they will have a great time.  I am actually very surprised this script made it past the Hollywood legal litmus test.  Once moviegoers learn about the unfunny and all too real event of which this movie is making light, they will feel awful they helped financially support the makers of this film.  This is a poor attempt at comedy following a horrifying episode.  If you still aren’t convinced, go ahead and Google “pizza delivery guy bomb.”  Just don’t do it at work and make sure you start running the water for your shame bath before you hit play.

So, Will It Suck?

No.  The movie will be funny.  Ansari will continue his well deserved comedic rise.  Eisenberg’s already built up enough fame equity to come out of this relativley unscathed.  McBride and Swardson have a devoted following already, so they’re safe.  The writers, Michael Diliberti and Matthew Sullivan better make a sincere Mother Theresa biopic or something before their karma is damaged beyond repair.